I too am one of those moms.
My first experience with my 1st daughter was horrible, looking back.
My breasts never swelled or gre during pregnancy and my daughter never latched properly to stimulate milk production. However, deep down I always believed that I was built for it because I never got breast in the first place and had to have augmentation at 19. NOw I know peopel who had no breast tissue at all and got implants but then when baby came along... holy milk station! But me no.
I was depressed, so sad and felt so guilty even less of a woman or mother. I did herbs, prescription, pump, nursing and after my daughter lost more than 10% of her body weight in the first 10 days... I had to feed her!
When my second daughter was born 21 months later those feelings and wounds were still fresh and I was terrified to have a repeat of a dehydrated, deprived and staving child so I jumped on the formula wagon right away - even though she latched well!
I wanted to breast feed sooo much, and it was sooo stressful. I didn't particularly "like" it and i hated just sitting there for hours, (I felt unaccomplished) for god knows why? But I STILL to this day (my oldest is 4.5 years) have hang ups about it and wonder if there was something else I could have done.
It messes with your heart and mind. More support is needed.