Moms That Can't Breastfeed

Can't Breastfeed?

I believe that there are mothers out there, that just can't breastfeed, not because of any normal breastfeeding problem, but because they are just unable.

These are mothers that have tried everything, they have tried to get help and have still not been able to breastfeed. There is not enough support out there for them, and they feel terribly depressed because of this. If this sounds like you, then I hope that you will find some sort of encouragement from knowing that you are not the only one.

Here are some stories of other moms with the same problem…

Annie...

"I searched the web for anybody who has had a similar dilemma as myself and could not find a single article etc. I had my little boy a year

back, throughout my pregnancy (first pregnancy) I realised that my breasts where not swollen, but didn’t fret a great deal about it. What does a first time mommy know? All I knew was that I couldn’t wait to experience holding him and breastfeeding him for the first time.

The doctor and nurses reassured me a day after he was born, that my milk would start coming in after the third day…so I waited…nothing! And the worst part was everybody was still expecting me to breastfeed my child…saying that there was no such thing as a woman who cannot breastfeed or who doesn’t have milk. I can remember lying on the hospital bed crying through the night with my baby, he was so hungry and every time I called a nurse to help they would bring me 40ml of formula milk. I tried breastfeeding for two whole months…Don stayed hungry so I had to start feeding him formula with trying to breastfeed him.

I asked the doctor for help and she put me on tablets, tablets that would help me produce milk. Later I started using the pump to see how much milk was in fact coming out, the most milk I could get out in a day was about 100ml. After about three months of trying I stopped entirely. I was depressed about this but my husband made me feel better by saying that it was best if I rather stop worrying about it and just begin feeding Donovan formula.

I was ridiculed by my own family, told how unhealthy it was to stop breastfeeding, even though they knew how I had struggled. Even our paediatrician when he asked if Donovan was still being breastfed said that most mothers give up too fast! I felt terrible…I felt like there was something wrong with me.

I really feel that there should be more info out there for moms, especially first time moms who feel insecure and who don’t know what to do, how to do things properly etc. I want to have another child but I can’t bare going through the same thing again. For me breastfeeding is very important and I think that it really does help allot for bonding with your child because I felt very distant towards my baby in the beginning.

I can’t imagine being able to breastfeed and then deciding not to. It’s such a precious gift that most people just take for granted."


Kat…

"I had exactly the same issue. No one wanted to tell me that some women just can't breast feed. To this day I still wonder why breastfeeding is thought of as a perfect function, why it seems to be exempt from the complications that any biological function may suffer. Life is not that simple. There is a reason for wet nurses and formula beyond a stereotypical excuse like convenience. I believe that some women just cannot produce breast milk. Whether it be hormonal or genetic, it is a reality that for whatever reason has been down-played and ignored by the majority of the medical community. It is sad really. To make a woman feel like less than a woman or mother because her breasts simply won't fill with milk is ignorant and abusive. I wish that someone would dedicate more time, money and research into this subject."


Amie...

“I don't typically comment related to anything I find on the internet but I feel this article is very important. I too experienced trying to feed my son for 6 weeks without supplementing with formula. I was pumping in between feedings to attempt to increase my supply and nothing. The most I ever got from both breast was about 1 ounce. One breast was producing almost nothing. When I decided to switch to formula and saw my constantly crying baby suck down bottle after bottle finally getting fed it was a huge relief and I never looked back.

After my second son was born I never even considered breastfeeding. The first experience of angst about not being able to produce was enough for me. Everyone made me feel like it was about my technique but I spent hours upon hours trying everything I could think of and working with a lactation consultant for a month. When the nurses started giving me looks after my second son was born about my choice to formula feed I made a declaration to all of the hospital staff treating me and my disapproving family that this was my choice and if they wanted to choose how to feed a baby they were welcome to have one. No one asked anymore questions after that. I'm all for education but I refuse to let someone make me feel guilty about a decision I believe I am making in the best interest of my child."


By Amanda...

“I had the same problem. I could only pump about 1-2 tbsp. a day. I pumped and pumped every day for several weeks. But I finally gave up. I couldn't stand trying to get her to breastfeed her sucking a little and then screaming. She wasn't getting anything!! I was SO depressed and mad at myself over it. I thought what kind of mother can't make milk for her baby. I took herbs and drank herbal tea that was supposed to help. But I really couldn't find any information or help on the subject online or from my doctor. He said formula fed babies can be just as healthy. I don't think he realized the emotional effect of it all! I just remember my first month or so with my little girl as a horrible depressed miserable time. I'm pregnant again now. I hope I can keep from feeling that same way again. I have a different outlook on it now. My daughter is one of the healthiest kids I've ever seen. I have no pump this time. And I'm not going to buy one. I'm just going to try a week or two and if it doesn't work formula will! I do wish I could find some info on what could've caused it. But there seems to be no help out there.


Ladan...

After being so depressed to have to feed my baby formula, i was searching for any support group or forum that would make me feel a little better and less depressed. Surprisingly there are many sites that supports breastfeeding and cheer for successful moms, but absolutely none for moms who REALLY wanted to breastfeed but they could not.

I had difficulty with both my sons, and I cannot believe what a terrible feeling it is to fail in breastfeeding. As someone mentioned here, you would feel exactly a less of a woman.I wish there was something to calm down new sleep deprived moms whose bodies are in pain because of latching positions and instead of "15 minutes" at each breast, they spend hours awake to feed their baby.

My newborn would drink a whole 2 oz bottle after being at my breasts for more than 90 minutes. I gave up at month 4 with my first son and at day 7 with my second because I had a 3 year old who also needed my attention and I could not sit there for long hours with tubes and all other kinds of BF accessories to help with breastfeeding.

Go girls. I wish people knew that some moms don’t choose formula because of their own convenience but just to feed a crying hungry frustrated baby."


Stacey...

"I believe feeding Jason educated me one of my first lessons of motherhood: no matter how much I want what is best for my child, I can't always make it happen. And it's so annoying! Coming into this, I wanted to breastfeed her. I'm not sure why my heart was so set on that, but it was something that I was extremely determined to do. After watching her lose so much weight, having a doctor suggest supplementing with formula, crying over dry diapers, worrying that she was dehydrated, and having a representative of the local La Leche League tell me that the main goal was to feed her, rather than clinging so firmly to my own preferences, I had to face the reality that I won't be able to do what I wanted. At least not exclusively.

That was tough, because it made me face the fact that, although I strongly believe that she would get the most nutritional help from me, I can't give her that. I'm getting there, with the help of every wet and soiled diaper, the plump tiny cheeks and double chin, and every content sigh she makes when I lay her down after giving her a bottle. It's not what I had planned, but she seems to be blossoming now . . .

I think most people won't actually understand or care about this problem, but it has been overwhelming my life for the last couple of months."


June...

“I gave birth 3 months ago and wanted to breastfeed exclusively. I did not buy a bottle or formula and brought my baby home. After a week I realized that my baby was not gaining any weight and that I was only producing about 6 ounces a day. I worked with lactation consultants to increase my supply and went on drugs to increase my supply. I felt so guilty when I finally had to give my baby formula. I’m still using a SNS system to stimulate milk production, but my body just doesn’t seem to want to produce milk.

I never got any support and everything online always gives the impression that if you want to breastfeed, you can…but it doesn’t always work out that way. I feel like I am the only one with this problem."


Our step by step breastfeeding guide


Leave a comment

Want to share your stories? Ask a question or just say hello...

What Other Moms Have Said

Click below to see contributions from other visitors to this page...

Stella... 
I delivered a month ago and starting 3 days colostrum came and was feeding my little one. My baby would latch for an hour but still would be crying, …

Breastfeeding suddenly over 
I was in a car accident about 4 months ago and since that day I haven't breastfed my baby of (now) 8months. The Doctors and my family told me that …

Once I stop it's really over 
I had twin baby girls 2 months ago. They came early and by c-section and spent 2 1/2 weeks in the nicu. The doctors asked if i was ok with them getting …

Heart-broken, broken boobs but don't know why.  
I will always mourn that I will never know what that is like :( to exclusively feed a baby with my own breast milk. I am on my second and both times I …

Niplette Advice Anyone? 
I am currently trying for number two. I had very low milk supply with number one and supplemented with an SNS for three months before switching to bottle …

I'm the Grandma 
I don't know how to bring comfort to my daughter as she struggles with BF. it's not happening+ she's crying. It's not her choice but she's going to have …

Herbal capsule called Lactare.  
Hi, my baby girl is 3 months old now and I feed her a combination of breastmilk and formula. The first month was very frustrating with my baby crying …

not producing breast milk 
I was very happy to find this site. I had these same issues. Nursing my daughter was very important to me. When I was pregnant my breast never …

I developed preeclampsia and had no breastmilk 
I felt breast changes during pregnancy, I bought the nursing bras, the nursing pads, the breast milk freezer bags. I was so excited to try breastfeeding. …

can not breastfeed 
My daughter is 7 months old. She is formula feeding. I tried breastfeeding when she was born, but i didn't start producing milk until 5 days after …

Seeking Advice on Getting Over Low-Supply Depression 
I have been spending all of my free time and money trying to increase my supply, which has been slowly dwindling over the last three months. I have …

No Milk Large Breasts 
I'm 20 weeks into my 3rd pregnancy and iv never been able to breast feed. I just don't have any milk not a drop. My nan could never feed either. My …

today I've made the conscious decision to stop breastfeeding 
I'm done. I've been crying myself to sleep since my baby was born 6.5 weeks ago. They told me it would take 3-4 days before the milk came in. I only …

Painful to breastfeed 
My mom, when i was young used to say that it was painful to breastfeed. and now im 8 months prgnant but im scared it will be painful, but i really wnat …

selfishly sad 
I am mom to 6 beautiful children. I nursed my first son for a year, only stopping because I became pregnant with son #2 whom I nursed for 4 months, …

intense sadness and jealousy 
I come from a country where there is almost a "military-style" propaganda as far as breastfeeding goes. When I was pregnant with my first child, it …

Mourning exclusive BF 
I had always been told that it was IMPOSSIBLE to have low milk supply because of small breasts... This turns out not to be true. After trying everything.... …

Third times the charm right? NOT! 
I have always had small boobs and couldn't wait until they got bigger when I was pregnant for the first time. I kept waiting and waiting and it never …

Should I try again? 
Hi all, I had my first baby 16 years ago and sadly could not breast feed. I tried for 6 weeks and then went on to bottle feed her. I had no help I was …

not the only one with this problem 
Let me just say how grateful and happy I am to read that I'm not the only one! During my first pregnancy, my breasts didn't swell or even change cupsize. …

Premature birth and no milk 
I am glad to find this site, I am feeling very depressed and alone. My baby came 10 weeks early- it was very sudden and stressful and my inability to breastfeed …

Bottle Feeding support site. You are not alone! 
Bottle Babies is a non for profit organisation dedicated to supplying both practical and emotional support to parents who do not exclusively breastfeed …

unable to breastfeed 
It's great to finally see some other stories like mine. My milk just never came in, and I have no idea why. Breastfeeding councilors were worse than …

guilt over not breastfeeding 
I stated breastfeeding when I gave birth to my 3rd baby and everything was fine. Then after 3days it became a nightmare the pain was killing me so …

Click here to write your own.

perfect latch, huge breasts, insufficient millk! 
for years I told myself "I'll have a breast reduction after I have children and breast feed them" because my breasts are enormous and inconvenient to me …

this has broken my heart...hypoplastic breasts 
I had my first child when I was 20, and I thought breast feeding was kind of gross, to be honest. I never even considered anything other than using …

Weighing Nappies?? 
I'm wondering if keeping a record of formula taken and weighing nappies would be a good indication of how much milk my baby gets from me? Has anyone tried …

To try again or not? 
As a first time mom I was determined to breastfeed. My goal was to do so for at least 6 months. Everything I read assured me it might be a little challenging …

no milk supply at all 
I tried for 6 months for hours a day and night with no milk supply at all. It was so stressful l was advised to do top up but that was a full bottle …

Baby can't breastfeed because of social services 
My baby was taken from me at birth at the hospital, because I was 2 hours late to a non emergency c section. My breasts filled with milk and my little …

milk never came in 
I am so thankful I found this page. My daughter was born through emergency c-section. I lost a lot of blood and she was in the NICU for several weeks very …

Breasts were very small and nothing really was coming out 
I had the same experience as you ladies. When my daughter was born 6 years ago I was excited about breast feeding, but my breasts were very small and nothing …

bloody sores on my nipples 
With my first child, I was only able to breast feed for 2 weeks. I developed very painful, open bloody sores on my nipples...chunks of my nipple were even …

breasts not changing during pregnancy 
I had my first child at 20 and my second at 30 my breast milk came in when I was five months, but am 36 now and eight months and my breast show's no sign …

more milk advice please 
I had very low milk supply with my now 9 month son. He was losing weight when I breastfed. I took herbs, medication, expressed day and night for extra …

try to breastfeed my next baby 
The women out there who can breastfeed their LO's are blessed. It's very aggrevating when you hear a breastfeeding mom complaining that It hurts or that …

So glad I'm not alone 
When I got pregnant I knew immediately I wanted to BF. I started reading everything I could get my hands on about BFeeding and attended BF classes at my …

breastfeeding isn't always natural 
My pregnancy with my son (who is now 3) was a surprise. I had morning sickness and thought I had the flu. I didn't get pain or soreness in the breasts …

Breastfeeding struggles 
It's so good to read these stories and finally know that it isn't just me who has struggled. My daughter is 8 months old, I was always fully intent …

Failed Twice...Try a Third? 
As a first time mother I had grand plans of a natural birth, seamless breastfeeding and a beautiful, natural experience all around. Reality? An emergency …

Baby wont latch properly 
I can't breastfeed at all because my baby won't latch. I've been to 6 lactaction consultants and no one has been able to solve this problem. My milk …

not able to breastfeed 
Okay. I must comment on this one. I had a normal delivery without even an epidural. Hence breastfeeding never seemed like a task to me.... I was sadly …

feeling like a failure 
I run a support group for parents who are unable to breastfeed called Bottle Babies. Here is the link: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bottle-Babies/120819361329359#!/ …

From Bottle to Breast 
When i took my beautiful baby Anna back home, i never realized that she would get upset whenever i tried to feed her. I used formula milk with her, but …

Rach 
Thank you ladies for sharing your stories. I had a beautiful little boy 3 weeks ago and he loves to breastfeed. The only problem is that I am not …

not capable of breastfeeding 
Years ago I tried everything including pumping and was not able to breastfeed. I too thought it was my issue. My daughter just had her first baby, …

feelings of failure for not breastfeeding Not rated yet
I had four children and tried to breastfeed each of them unsuccessfully. I sought help from a lactation nurse, my midwife, my doctor and with each child …

Breast feeding struggles Not rated yet
I'm so happy to have found these comments. I'm a new mom who was also set on breast feeding. But I developed gestational diabetes during my pregnancy (despite …

I didn't and my baby is more than amazing! Not rated yet
I had a lot of guilt over not breastfeeding because that's what I always wanted to do but it's okay if you want to do formula. Here is my full story about …

Click here to write your own.

So helpful  Not rated yet
I am so relieved to hear these experiences from other mothers. I've felt like such a failure as a mother. I too tried breast feeding and pumping in an …

Preemie Mom Breastfeeding Problems Not rated yet
I've wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember, and I've always looked forward to breastfeeding as well. I was thrilled when I got pregnant. …

Ashley Not rated yet
I too am one of those moms. My first experience with my 1st daughter was horrible, looking back. My breasts never swelled or gre during pregnancy …

almost success then drop back down Not rated yet
I hoped to breastfeed my baby as studies shown that breastmilk has more nutrition than formula, but due to flat nipple she is unable to latch.. and when …

Bell Shaped Breasts Not rated yet
I had my first child and like most expecting mothers went to all the classes at the hospital on breast feeding with no thought that perhaps this wouldn't …

I so desperately wanted to breastfeed Not rated yet
Thank you all for your stories. I am like so many of you. My breasts never became full during pregnancy and I waited expectantly on day 3 postpartum for …

Unable to breastfeed baby Not rated yet
So happy to have found this. A year after having my son it still hurts to know I was unable to breastfeed. I cringe everytime I hear or read something …

Medical Condition - IGT Not rated yet
Inability to breastfeed is a very real medical condition called insufficient glandular tissue. It simply means that at some point, either during puberty …

New mom Not rated yet
Same with me. I always thought that I will breast feed my baby. But when my daughter was born she just could not latch on.also I was not producing much …

milk came back after two years Not rated yet
my experience is that i have a child of two years and i breast feed for one week now after two years milk came back is it normal ? :?

On not being able to breastfeed... Not rated yet
I find it is very insensitive and tactless for people to insist that there is no such thing as a woman who can't breastfeed. I felt like a complete failure …

It's not the most natural thing in the world.  Not rated yet
I absolutely cannot stand all the posts on Facebook and forums that ridicule and criticize all moms that formula feed. I tried and tried for 8 weeks. …

Feeling defeated/milk disappearing  Not rated yet
I am so confused. I am on child number two and am finally ready to throw in the towel. With my first child it took a bit for my milk to come in but …

Share your can't breastfeed story Not rated yet
Hi everyone, It has been very humbling to read what you have all shared. I am currently writing a book called "don't be bullied in to breastfeeding" …

no milk at all Not rated yet
I am discouraged... tried with my first for 3 months and had no milk... tried with my second no milk at all am 10 weeks post partum it's making me so tearful, …

its not the end of the world Not rated yet
I felt the same when i had my first child. I was under depression with my breast-feeding issue over 6mnths. People got shocked at my bottle feeding …

baby not gaining weight Not rated yet
Hi my partner and I have now four beautiful children, two boys aged 13,10 and then I had a little girl now aged 7. After a wonderful holiday in Jamaica …

I want to try again Not rated yet
It is reassuring to hear other Moms struggle with this as well. I have two beautiful girls at home, very healthy and another on the way. I struggled …

Thank You I'm Pregnant and have hope to Breastfeed Baby Number Two Not rated yet
Hi! I was so happy when I found this site. I felt so alone in BF... I had a C section 3 years ago and tried EVERYTHING to BF my baby girl. I was pumping …

This is the one and only place I have found others like me. Not rated yet
It is all true. When milk production was a problem for me La Leche and lactation consultants couldn't help. Domperidome didn't help. More milk plus....fenugreek....I …

Tuberous Breasts Not rated yet
I tried fenugreek, motilium, drinking lots, breastfeeding on demand, pumping after feeds, got baby's tongue tie snipped, saw a lactation consultant, cranial …

wasn't producing enough milk Not rated yet
Thank you so much for these stories! I cried reading them because it all sounded like what happened to me with my son. I wasn't producing enough …

It has been very trying. Not rated yet
I am on my 2nd child and having trouble breastfeeding again. My mom says, "just go upstais and put him on your boobs" My aunt says, "well, I just could …

second attempt at Breastfeeding. Not rated yet
This was my second attempt at Breastfeeding. With my first daughter she was not gaining weight and seemed really withdrawn and I never seemed to express …

I really wish people would understand Not rated yet
Thank you so much for this page! My baby was an emergency c-section with complications that ended up with him in NICU for 3 days. The combination of …

Click here to write your own.

inability to breast feed Not rated yet
I have a five week old, and an inability to breast feed. I was breast feeding exclusively for 3 weeks around the clock. He never gained weight. Pumping …

Mom of 4--  Not rated yet
I was also told that breast feeding was natural and would happen if my baby latched on properly! I was a young mother (age 20) 20 years ago with my first …

I'm so glad I'm not alone in all of this Not rated yet
After reading the many comments on here and hearing the frustration and sadness in them that echoes my own, I can say that while I don't wish anyone pain, …

My experience Not rated yet
I couldn't breastfeed either of my girls and I don't expect to with the one I am expecting. I tried all the herbal remedies the second time around …

feel so good after reading this Not rated yet
hello, i felt just exactly the same as most of the women here wrote. I did try for more than a month to breastfeed my baby girl without any success …

Low Milk Supply Combination Feeding Not rated yet
I am from India and its almost a sin here to give your baby formula for quite sometime. I had planned on Breastfeeding my 5 month old son and was all …

Thank You Everyone for Sharing Not rated yet
Thank God! I thought i'm a freak. Everyone else is going on and on and on how easy it is to breastfeed and here i am, producing less than 1 tbsp of milk …

Combination Feeding Low Milk Supply Not rated yet
My first son had tongue tie when he was born and he became dehydrated at 3 days old and had to be put on a drip and in the special care nursery. I …

Bottle feeding support sites? Not rated yet
When I was 20, i made the choice to have a breast reduction to eliminate my weekly trips to the chiropractor. I was aware of the risk that I would …

moms who are not producing Not rated yet
I just found this support site after looking for days for information about breastfeeding for moms who are not producing. My son is only 6 days old, …

tried so hard to breastfeed Not rated yet
Thank you all for sharing your stories! It helps me feel so much better! With my first daughter I tried so hard to breastfeed. I went to a class …

run out of milk Not rated yet
I think it would be helpful for me to set up an online support group for this issue. I had a difficult time starting off with my first but was able to …

Learning to accept Not rated yet
Nursing my Daughter now and will soon supplement with a bottle of formula. I wish I could give her what she needs through breast milk alone but am …

I am so glad I found this page! Not rated yet
I have PCOS. Poly cyst ovarian syndrome. My doctor told me that frankly, I was lucky to even get pregnant. (It was a one night stand, so it was a miracle …

I tried and tried and tried and it's okay Not rated yet
I had 2 very complicated births. I had preeclampsia with my first child. He was born 4 weeks early. I had decided to give breast feeding a try with …

Sheehans syndrome Not rated yet
My milk never came in after birth of son due to prolactin deficiency. My pituaitary was damaged during labor not because of bleeding out (the normal cause …

my struggles with breastfeeding Not rated yet
I am so comforted to see this...NOW. My little man is now 10 months old and I went through such pain, depression, and judgement over my struggles with …

breastfeeding is highly overrated Not rated yet
Gosh! My son is now 7 years old and my daughter 5. They are the brightest kids of the block and I am not just saying this because I am a doting mom. …

Milk came in late/mastitis/breastfeeding a screaming baby Not rated yet
When I had my first son, I was determined to breastfeed, had done all the research, read all the books, and got LOTS of advice from family especially my …

my decision to now formula feed Not rated yet
I had my baby 6 weeks ago and breastfeeding is a trauma. The most I produce when I pump is 50 to 60 ml. Feedings take well over an hour 15 mins each …

Not Producing Enough Milk Not rated yet
For all those moms that couldn't breastfeed because you were unable to produce milk it's okay....I was unable to myself and my daughter is 2 years old, …

Pain in milk ducks.... Not rated yet
On one occasion I fed my son when he was about a month old and I think he sucked so hard I had extreme pain in the back part of my breast. Almost like …

Check out this Support Group Not rated yet
Try joining this group: plenty of similarly affected mums to relate to: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/mobi/

I have a medical condition (inverted nipples) Not rated yet
I am so glad I have found this site. I am the same as everyone on here. I have a medical condition (inverted nipples) and it has been the one thing I have …

planned to breastfeed Not rated yet
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has told their story and I hope more new mums who are struggling with breast feeding find this website. …

Click here to write your own.

each pregnancy/baby is different Not rated yet
June, I love that you're using a SNS, as baby will still get your milk as well. Also, it's worth remembering that baby's are so much more efficient than …

Support from my pediatrician Not rated yet
I had a c-section in March and wanted to breastfeed my baby boy. We spent 4 days in the hospital with the nurses and the lactation specialists stopping …

Pediatrician Not rated yet
Thank you for this site! As a pediatrician, you can imagine the guilt I feel being unable to breastfeed my children. After my first baby Isabelle …

Mother of eight... Not rated yet
I have been a mother 8 times and not one of them were I able to breastfeed. I was completely devastated each and every time but never as much. As I was …

Click here to write your own.